InSearchForAReasons

Accepting my failures

All the failures i had in the past came to haunt me, i wonder what have i done in the past by myself which i'm proud of? Truth is in my 3 years of studies in poly my exams wasn't achieved by myself, i had help from friends around me. In just a short month i'm ending my poly years, i have to go through 2 years of wasted national service. What scares me is the years after that, i have to venture into a world which i'm not familiar with. Meeting a whole new level of people, trying to cope to their paces. Right now i'm really keen and interested to apply myself to a bar tending school. What i'm afraid of is my abilities to achieved results. Am i able to do it? Okay! I know the " Won't die trying Rule ". Problem lies within myself, i'm pulled down by doubts of my own abilities. Call me weak call me anything.

Facts is i'm thinking right now about my future.
Thinking whats best for me
Thinking with my two bare hands what i can provide to society and the people around me
Thinking improvements to be made about myself
Thinking of changing myself for the better

Best i'll try
Strive i'll try
For the life i once lived in
For the life i prepared to live