InSearchForAReasons

It has been confusion parade these few days. Whats wrong with u seriously? What are u trying to prove...if i'm sharp enough to trust my instinct i think i know whats happening, seriously i know. I would not mind one day u come and confront me about it.
If u know me well enough, i don't mix relations. This is this, that is that. I Don't mix it. Hope u understand. Know this well, i choose who to spend my time with, i choose the people around me. There's a reason for it, i see potential in this friendship. If i don't see potential in others, i won't really give a shit about them. Hope u read this and get it into your head. I'm serious when handling relations..i'll go all the way for a good friendship.



Gona post this together.


About myself.
I really want to know everything. i really do.
I'm having serious doubt about my abilities after each night pass. I'm going into desperate period of my life. Mind is telling me this but society telling me otherwise. I'm doubting the mindset of females, Doesn't Gals like guys whom are deep? Anymore? So gals now sees Money? It's just whats going through my head...not pointing at anyone. I'm loosing faith in serious relationships...Sometimes i wonder why cant i be just a fking playboy...take relationship lightly.
Whereas Me always being serious with relationships i cant get the girl i want...

I have asked u once, it's gonna take a whole world of courage to ask u again.
Trust me it's hard it's confusing it's a pain in the heart just to think about it.
It's stressful, it's darnfuckingfuckedup...As long as there's a split second of silence i'll be thinking of you...I woke up thinking of you, Before sleeping i thought of you, Dreams about you.

It's never friends i wana be in the first place, it's never friend in the first place. I wonder how long i can pull through, Everyday have been telling myself to pull through this because as long as i'm able to see u for a second all my troubles all my worries all my stress just fades away.